I found this particulary good write-up in The Economic Times of 3rd March, 2007 by Vithal C. Nadkarni on Optimism. Here I re-type the whole matter, as I could feel a strange but sure resonance with my experiences and convictions.
Teach yourself to be Optimistic
Psychologist Martin Seligman is acclaimed as a high priest of positive psychology. In his earlier avatar in the opposite camp, he probed topics such as symptoms of despair. He made his key discovery about 'learned helplessness' with the help of dogs, not their masters. Repeated exposure to inescapable shock, he found, was 'teaching' dogs that nothing they did would make an iota of difference to their miserable condition. What Seligman was proposing was heresy. He recalls meeting B F Skinner, the legendary proponent of Behaviourism, in a men's room after a lecture, only to be chastised grandly: "Animals don't think anything; they only behave!"
But seligman persisted with the conviction that his animal model could help in explaining the sense of utter helplessness that lies at the core of human depression. Seligman's landmark research also revealed that a small percentage of animals never became passive in the face of adversity. Similarly, in his later studies extended to humans, the psychologists found a corresponding minority of subjects who refused to learn to be helpless. So how does one separate the 'hard-boiled' from those who readily throw in the towel at the first hint of adversity?
The difference, Seligman reasoned, lay in the manner in which people 'explain' or rationalise good and bad events to their lives. Paradoxically, those who cheerfully bounce back from upsets, he said, might have an innately optimistic explanatory style that may even contain elements of 'self-serving' illusions; they might overestimate their abilities of talents while shrugging off responsibility for loses and failures. On the other hand, people prone to despair had a persistently negative style marked by brutal (read self deprecatory) honesty: neither inclined to grandiosity nor seeing themselves as charmed children of destiny, they were 'at the mercy of reality' Seligman argued.
So how does one turn off that cloud of darkness and despair hovering over one's head into a halo of brightness and good cheer? Try the exact opposite of learned helplessness - learned optimism, he said. Teach yourself to be optimistic with a tool that deliberately disputes catastrophic thinking. Bolstering the illusions that make life bearable, he said, was one of the roles of therapy. This was akin to what poetry does by giving us the lie we need to stay alive.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Friday, February 09, 2007
Career Match
Here is an article that I've lifted straight from http://troubledwith.com/Transitions/A000000987.cfm?topic=transitions%3A%20changing%20jobs, which almost satiated the desperate feelings that has been welling up within me, these days.
Copyright © 2003 John Bradley
How do I discover what I'm good at?
I remember a meeting in my office when the visitor, an engineer, looked at me and said, "I'm 45 and I still don't know what I should be when I grow up." Although he attempted to laugh as if it were a joke, I affirmed him. I said that I have heard that very statement from many adults who are finally being honest. This honesty then indicates a readiness to do something significant with one's life before it is too late. Let me briefly comment on this person's dilemma and then give some words of advice. There are two myths that I have found confuse one's ability to make a logical choice regarding one's life work.
First is the illusion that we can set our minds to do just about anything we set our minds to do. This viewpoint unfortunately has crept into most of our schools and universities. It is the positive mental attitude perspective. All we need is motivation, training and education. Surprisingly, this myth does work for a while, especially for young adults. However, somewhere at around 30 35 years of age the hype wears off if there is no intuitive talent to keep the career advancing. Slow promotions, loss of challenge, major mistakes or accidents increase. A job will go from bad to worse if the core duties do not match our innate talents. Natural talents are the heart of career satisfaction and ultimate success; and each of us have enough for more than one career.
A second myth is that one's passion is a result of one's innate aptitudes. I have way too many client files that prove otherwise. I well remember a client who was very motivated to sell stocks and securities. He researched the field thoroughly. He purchased an expensive wardrobe of suits, shoes and shirts. Initially I had warned him that this was a sales type of position and that it didn't appear to best fit his aptitudes. He was not to be deterred. He felt the training he would receive would overcome any of his limitations.
When it came time for him to begin calling brokerage firms to set up job interview appointments, his motivation came to a halt. He wasn't able to get one appointment. His tremendous passion was not able to overcome the lack of sales aptitude even with the telephone call scripting and personal coaching I provided for him. This middle aged man definitely had natural talent strengths, but selling for brokerage firms was not a good fit. His tenacity was to be commended. His wisdom in decision making however, was lacking.
So let's consider some positive action steps.
Step One: Know the difference between your learned skills, your motivation and your innate skills. To really find the ideal career, it should represent something you are motivated to pursue (your interests and your values). Secondly, the ideal career should represent your innate skills, your talents. It is your talents that intuitively will understand the job and seek to grow through intuitive trial and error. Selecting a new career because it fits your education or past work experience (learned skills) will not necessarily provide for a best fit.
Step Two: Know what a good fit looks like. Too many people are out looking for the perfect career, but they don't know what to look for. Begin by identifying a job that you know something about, within a preferred organization (Step One). Ask to meet with someone who is in that position in a preferred organization. My clients have been performing these informational interviews for 25 years with very positive results. Busy people will take their time to meet with you if they sense that you are serious and will listen to their advice. In case this step of sorting out the job position is too difficult, there are aptitude assessments and career-matching services that can help you determine your innate strengths and match these to best career options.
Step Three: The Job Search. It is important to understand that the majority of jobs (80%) are filled before they ever become a posted vacancy on the Internet or in the paper. Most positions are filled by word of mouth, an employee referral or by internal promotions. To be successful in getting hired for that ideal career, seek the coaching of two or three people who are in the position you want. Ask them what they suggest you do. What is the inside track? Even Federal and State government agencies have a "hidden" inside track. Yes, there are professionals who can help you plan and put into action a job search campaign. You can find some in your yellow pages under career guidance services. With all of this information, you have a big head start. The most important concept, however, is to believe that there really is something out there with your name on it. I can testify that my 30 years of helping mid career adults has identified several ideal fits for every client, no matter how educated or how old.
Copyright © 2003 John Bradley.
Copyright © 2003 John Bradley
How do I discover what I'm good at?
I remember a meeting in my office when the visitor, an engineer, looked at me and said, "I'm 45 and I still don't know what I should be when I grow up." Although he attempted to laugh as if it were a joke, I affirmed him. I said that I have heard that very statement from many adults who are finally being honest. This honesty then indicates a readiness to do something significant with one's life before it is too late. Let me briefly comment on this person's dilemma and then give some words of advice. There are two myths that I have found confuse one's ability to make a logical choice regarding one's life work.
First is the illusion that we can set our minds to do just about anything we set our minds to do. This viewpoint unfortunately has crept into most of our schools and universities. It is the positive mental attitude perspective. All we need is motivation, training and education. Surprisingly, this myth does work for a while, especially for young adults. However, somewhere at around 30 35 years of age the hype wears off if there is no intuitive talent to keep the career advancing. Slow promotions, loss of challenge, major mistakes or accidents increase. A job will go from bad to worse if the core duties do not match our innate talents. Natural talents are the heart of career satisfaction and ultimate success; and each of us have enough for more than one career.
A second myth is that one's passion is a result of one's innate aptitudes. I have way too many client files that prove otherwise. I well remember a client who was very motivated to sell stocks and securities. He researched the field thoroughly. He purchased an expensive wardrobe of suits, shoes and shirts. Initially I had warned him that this was a sales type of position and that it didn't appear to best fit his aptitudes. He was not to be deterred. He felt the training he would receive would overcome any of his limitations.
When it came time for him to begin calling brokerage firms to set up job interview appointments, his motivation came to a halt. He wasn't able to get one appointment. His tremendous passion was not able to overcome the lack of sales aptitude even with the telephone call scripting and personal coaching I provided for him. This middle aged man definitely had natural talent strengths, but selling for brokerage firms was not a good fit. His tenacity was to be commended. His wisdom in decision making however, was lacking.
So let's consider some positive action steps.
Step One: Know the difference between your learned skills, your motivation and your innate skills. To really find the ideal career, it should represent something you are motivated to pursue (your interests and your values). Secondly, the ideal career should represent your innate skills, your talents. It is your talents that intuitively will understand the job and seek to grow through intuitive trial and error. Selecting a new career because it fits your education or past work experience (learned skills) will not necessarily provide for a best fit.
Step Two: Know what a good fit looks like. Too many people are out looking for the perfect career, but they don't know what to look for. Begin by identifying a job that you know something about, within a preferred organization (Step One). Ask to meet with someone who is in that position in a preferred organization. My clients have been performing these informational interviews for 25 years with very positive results. Busy people will take their time to meet with you if they sense that you are serious and will listen to their advice. In case this step of sorting out the job position is too difficult, there are aptitude assessments and career-matching services that can help you determine your innate strengths and match these to best career options.
Step Three: The Job Search. It is important to understand that the majority of jobs (80%) are filled before they ever become a posted vacancy on the Internet or in the paper. Most positions are filled by word of mouth, an employee referral or by internal promotions. To be successful in getting hired for that ideal career, seek the coaching of two or three people who are in the position you want. Ask them what they suggest you do. What is the inside track? Even Federal and State government agencies have a "hidden" inside track. Yes, there are professionals who can help you plan and put into action a job search campaign. You can find some in your yellow pages under career guidance services. With all of this information, you have a big head start. The most important concept, however, is to believe that there really is something out there with your name on it. I can testify that my 30 years of helping mid career adults has identified several ideal fits for every client, no matter how educated or how old.
Copyright © 2003 John Bradley.
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